What was my fault
When I born, at that time I didn't need any thing, no bread, no water, and no cloths. I did not know any one and no any one knew about me. I was living in sea, there was loneliness, and there I was glade and growing. Many times passed, when my time finished in the sea, then it was necessary I come out from the sea. When I kept my first step in the world, I heard frightful noise and first time I saw the people, people were wearing cloths but I was without cloths. When people looked at me then they laughed at me, I was in wonderful situation (condition).
When first time I putout my head from the sea that time my head was very slim, one woman took my head and caught it, I felt that my head separated from my body. I couldn't bear this. I cried and started weeping and said that, I don’t need this world. That sea was good for me there was loneliness, there was peace and safety, there wasn't any noise, but I couldn't do any thing because my time was finished in the sea. Therefore it was necessary I come out form the sea.
When I come out from the sea then I was closed in one room. The old woman was catching my head and I was weeping, slowly I came out from the sea and one Woman took sassier and cut my Navel, the other women was looking at me carefully then she laughed and said she is a girl, here I got Mother and father, but my parents were unhappy from my birth, because they wanted a boy, but place of boy born a girl, that was I, they given me name Maikaan, but my parents didn't love me, they were not looking for me. They didn't buy any thing for me. I grew in the society with out my parent’s help, after five years God gave my parents a boy. They saw him and they were very happy. He was my brother they loved to much my brother. In his they forget me. I was weeping and crying everyday, but they didn't take attention at my crying, they were ignoring me every day. When I was seven years old then my parents decided that I’m burden on them, therefore they thought to put me in Hostel, where the children live without parents, that day came my father took and left me in hostel and he went back home, that day I lost my parents. I started weeping and crying I called papa I love you. Please do not leave me here, I am your daughter, I want to come with you, because I am from your blood, I don’t need any new cloths, new boots, new toys, and no any chocolates.
Papa I want only your love. Please don’t leave me here. I can’t leave here with out you, you are my need, I love you, and I am your daughter. Papa! Why you do not want to listen me, why you do not understand me, why you do not take interest with me. Why you left me alone and going without me. Finally tell me
is it my fault
But he didn't want to listen me and left me there, I was weeping and crying, I called for help but no body listen me. In that hostel one worker came and took my hand, showed me one room and said this is your place, listen me carefully, if you left your room then it is not good for you and went out. That time no any body helped me. I was weeping and crying and I tired and slept.
Many times passed but my parents not came to meet me. Every month they sent money for me. But they didn't understand, I have no need of money but I need my parents love, I remembered them every day. Whole thirteen years passed but my parents didn't come to meet me. Now I am waiting for that time when my parents come and meet me. Then I will ask them, what was my fault? Was that my fault, I born in your home! Was that my fault, I was a girl? Was that my fault, I loved you? Was that my fault, I don’t tell you about any thing. Was that my fault, I need your love? Was that my fault, I cannot be owner of your property. At the end what was the reason you left me alone and went back home, and till today you didn't meet me. Now I’m younger and thinking, when my marriage procession will come. When I wear my marriage clothes, When they turnover their lover hands on my head, When I will go my new home.
Whole twenty years I am waiting for you, please only one time say me: it
was my fault
and forgive me, I will serve you all my life…
Written by Shaikof Baloch